I began playing Citizen Sleeper after receiving many positive recommendations to play the game.

First being described to me as a visual novel, which does the game a disservice. Not that I have anything against visual novels, but the focus on that aspect of the narrative ignores how important the ludince of the game is to feeling the impact of that narrative.

Second, it was described to me as a tabletop board game. Which is appropriate considering the game's systems are based on the Blades In The Dark ttrpg. Each day you roll 6 dice, which you will use to tackle challenges of various difficulties. But as the days go on, and your condition as a character deteriorates, you will have fewer and fewer dice. Allowing that condition dwindle to zero leads to a character death, and a game over. However, my bias regarding ttrpgs proved to me my sabotage in this case. I had been an avid fan of dungeons and dragons, but the shift away from rpg mechanics toward free-form improv’ have dwindled my personal interest. Mainly because people are often unwilling to allow the game mechanics to guide those stories. Making for often disappointing stories.

But the last recommendation I received sold me. That Citizen Sleeper is the spiritual successor to Disco Elysium that we have been waiting for.

I would say that is mostly true. Sleeper doesn't have the same sort of anger and bitterness toward the body politik as Elysium. And yet it is in no way lacking when it comes to a harrowing narrative that draws inspiration from corporate corruption, disillusionment with union efficacy, the fantasy of anarchic communes living in harmony with nature, and the regular people who are caught in the crossfire.

You wake up as a Sleeper, a robotic copy of a debt slave in some far away corporate prison. 

Repaired by some random old repairman, but still on borrowed time. The hunger of a body that needs biofuel. The planned obsolescence of a body that requires a certain drug to survive. The desire of a business to reclaim its assets, and its willingness to cut losses when dealing with Human Capital.

My time on The Eye, the all but abandoned and derelict space colony which Citizen Sleeper takes place on, was characterized first by barely surviving, and pointing myself toward any lead that would allow me to run away.

Mission 1 > Escape The Eye

Between the bounty hunter coming to claim my head, mysterious software monsters looking to frag my mind, and the union that runs the defacto government being in cahoots with the corp trying to kill me, leaving the eye seemed like the best plan at every moment. Using every one of my die on winning a ticket off The Eye, to be whisked away to colonize some planet even farther away was a no-brainer. 

The Sidereal Horizon colony ship was the first available option for escape. Whereas most the people I met were trying to use me for my value as a Sleeper, Getting to know Lem, another engineer working on the sidereal, and his adopted daughter Mina, were the first real friendships that I formed.

On the one hand, going for this ending felt a little cheap. Like I was cheating myself out of the experience of the game's story by taking the first available out. But I figured, why not? I'm a busy youtube man. I have other games to play. Finishing the game with an optimistic ending seemed good to me. Having run out of healing items, and the bounty hunter only 1 day away, it seemed like the only option. Besides, I don't really care for any of the other characters I met on The Eye. (Except for Emphis, but I wasn't about to stay for a bowl of mushroom soup.)

I was naive. I should have seen the double cross coming. There was no ending and no exit on the Sidereal this time. Upon failing to get a ticket, my game became a mad dash to find new places to live, new ways the get the resources I needed to defend myself, new relationships to support me in times of need. 

Missions 2 > Survive The Eye

It was in this phase of the game that I was able to start solving all the various hazards the game had placed in front of me. The various pressures that threatened life and limb were slowly being solved, and I came to meet all of the other residents on The Eye.

From exposing corruption to finding work as a mushroom farmer, I scoured every corner of The Eye, met every person, and found myself no longer looking for my next ending. I would play for hours, and I dreamt about going back. With each ending I encountered, I was presented another opportunity to leave The Eye. I would take that ending, and a day or two later, reload my save, and choose to stay on the Eye once more. Picking up a shift at Bliss's space port, to helping Peak and Eshe find supplies to support the Refugees that have come to the Eye.

As I worked through all of the possible endings, none of them would feel right. Because every ending was an exit. So I kept playing until there was absolutely nothing left to do on The Eye but live. Making Citizen Sleeper one of my favorite and more memorable games of this year.

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Thesis/Conclusion: Citizen Sleeper is a game about running away, until it’s not. Sure, you can aim for a single ending where you successfully escape The Eye, avoiding all the problems of the corporation that owns you. Sometimes that means escaping being a person at all. But to continue playing the game on the same save file means loading back in, being reset, and choosing to stay at every opportunity. Eventually the challenge of the game: struggling for money, safety, food and repairs, even the harsh randomness of the dice, they all fall away as The Eye becomes your home. I stayed for that bowl of mushroom soup.

Every escape is melancholy. Every choice to stay comes with a bittersweet farewell to people who I learned to care about. Citizen Sleeper teaches us that home isn’t about finding the best life, but choosing a place to plant your roots and finding peace with that. Home isn’t something you find; it’s something you grow.

Thank you for watching.

Take care of yourselves.

And stay true.